Want to tame and train your inner critic? – You learned this in kindergarten.

Here we are at the beginning of a new week, full of new possibilities and opportunities to grow and learn and to live fully!

I woke up to beautiful, warm sunshine streaming into my bedroom, already buzzing with excitement about the things happening in my business and just generally grateful for this beautiful life. Before I even got out of bed I knew today would be awesome, and it has been thus far!

When you think about it, isn’t that how it usually works out?

When you think it will be a great day, somehow the day rises up to meet that challenge. And when you allow yourself to get caught up in that dialogue with your inner critic, you know that nagging voice that sometimes pops into your heard, you begin to focus on all the reasons that your day is going to SUCK – et voila!- it usually does.

Well, that is how it usually plays out for me anyway. And being prone to bouts of deductive reasoning, I made the decision to stop entertaining that inner critic, whom I often refer to as Deedee Doomanddont (pronounced “doom and don’t”), unless she had something constructive to say. Since Deedee is quite social and loves company, she had to play by my rules or GET OUT OF MY HEAD.

So how do you tame your inner critic? How do you get that voice of the Deedee Doomanddonts, the Debbie Downers and the Willy Whatifyoufails to stop filling your head with self-fulfilling and self-defeating doom-and-don’t thoughts?

There are lots of techniques to help you tame and train your inner critic to support you. This one is bare-bones simple – STOP LISTENING! Turn Your Back on Your Inner Critic

I literally began cutting my inner critic off in her tracks. Each time “you can’t do that”, “this is going to be a disaster” or some other “doom and don’t” statement came up, I silenced the voice with a childhood trick; simply repeating, “You are talking to me, I am not listening! Unless you can say something nice, don’t say anything!*”

Continue to repeat until you no longer hear that voice or it begins to offer encouragement and constructive, creative ideas on how you CAN make something happen. It takes some determination- and the willingness to say this aloud if necessary, but it works like a charm.

Today is a perfect day to try this out and let me know how it works for you! Have an amazing week- you already know it will be!

*NOTE: You learn lots of useful stuff growing up with seven siblings. And in case any of them are reading, I adore my brothers and sisters!

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About Denise Banks-Grasedyck, Coach. Consultant. Speaker.

I'm an entrepreneur, a wife and a mother. I'm a Freedom Fighter for the overcommitted professional and a designer of Ideal-Life and Business blueprints. Discovering and developing simple solutions to complex challenges is one of my super powers. I write about life and business and everything that intersects them.
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7 Responses to Want to tame and train your inner critic? – You learned this in kindergarten.

  1. patrice says:

    For me, a Presence Practice works to stop the chatter in my head. I stop to listen every now and again to whether there is chatter from my timekeeper, doubter, problem solver or storymakerupper. Whatever the chatter in my head, it drains the energy and Presence fills it right up. Thanks for this!

  2. Wendi Kelly says:

    We spend a lot of time dealing with these inner voices in our Journey Class and kicking their negativity to the curb. The real trick is in turning them into valuable Allies! It can be done!

  3. Kerstin says:

    Sounds kind of weired but when those negative inner voices come up and I am not in public I say aloud NO! STOP! and shake my head (like dogs do when they have an itchy ear). And it works!! And when it happens when I am on the street or in the office I visualize a huge Stop sign and silently my mind yells NO! It took some practice but it works pretty good for me now. Thank God! 🙂

  4. My dad told me once “Imagine the best it can be and the worst it can be, and you know it’ll be somewhere in the middle.” So I had that. HOWEVER, it’s a little tricky, because although it’s not predicting my doom, it’s also not shooting for the stars, right? So it’s been tricky to move to a more assertive model, trying to attain my dreams and not settle for ‘somewhere in the middle’, let’s say. So thank you for this, I’m still working it out! xx Angela

  5. Wanda Baader says:

    Your blog posts put a smile on my face today. I love that you named your inner critic Deedee Doomanddonts. You have such a wonderful and creative mind! I never thought about naming my inner critic but I’m going to have to come up with something now. Thanks for reminding us that we are not alone in our self-doubting worlds. We all go through it. 🙂

  6. Congrats on finding a solution that works for you to tame the negative head trash! It’s easy to get sucked in, and everyone needs to find their own way to acknowledge them, and set them aside to keep moving forward.

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